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Pixel art slice 'em up Take My Machete coming to iPhone this Thursday

Knife on Mars

Pixel art slice 'em up Take My Machete coming to iPhone this Thursday
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| Take My Machete

If Hollywood has taught us anything, it's that the best way to keep alien hordes at bay is a bloody great pulse rifle, or a swooshy laser sword.

Indie dev Upper Class Walrus is suggesting iOS gamers try another approach, however, with its retro arcade beat-'em-up Take My Machete.

As you have no doubt gathered from the game's title, this particular alien invasion will be stopped using the sharpest and shiniest object in mankind's defensive arsenal: a bloody great knife.

Played out over four single screen stages, players must battle green spacemen, flying saucers, and weird centipede-looking things.

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Presented in a pixel-art style, Take My Machete's simple control and nostalgia-inducing character design give us a warm, '90s era glow.

If you're worried that hacking extraterrestrials to bits with a machete might get a bit old, our hero can also wield a bow and arrow, or even a guitar.

There's also a dog scuttling around the screen, but we'll have to wait and see whether he's going to be useful (Lassie), or a liability (that mutt in Alien 3).

Take My Machete will land on iPhone this Thursday, when you will be able to download it for free. If you fancy it.
James Gilmour
James Gilmour
James pivoted to video so hard that he permanently damaged his spine, which now doubles as a Cronenbergian mic stand. If the pictures are moving, he's the one to blame.