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Top 10 characters we'd like to see in an iOS all-stars brawler

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Top 10 characters we'd like to see in an iOS all-stars brawler

The release of PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale on the PS Vita and the forthcoming release of Smash Bros on the Nintendo 3DS has got us thinking.

Isn't it about time iOS got its own all-stars brawler?

It's the perfect way to celebrate the wealth of truly memorable and iconic characters on iPhone and iPad, as well as to reflect upon some of the outstanding games that have contributed to the success of Apple's mobile platform.

It would also give us the chance to beat up an Angry Bird as the dude out of Infinity Blade. And who wouldn't want to do that?

Here are 10 of the characters we think should make the starting roster. Each has been picked on the basis of the host game's success and influence on the wider iOS gaming scene, though the character itself has to be likeable and distinctive, as well (hence, no Temple Run goon).

Red Bird (Angry Birds)

Angry Birds has provided the iOS platform with some of the most iconic characters in modern gaming. We'd go with the Red Bird from the AB universe for our all-stars outing, mind, on account of Red being the default and most recognisable character in the game.

We imagine Red Bird would be fairly slow and weak, but capable of pausing to wind up an unstoppable attack, thanks to the joys of elastic (and a good aim). Call in the Mighty Eagle for a blitz attack when things get sticky.

Swampy (Where's My Water?)

'Why Swampy?' Well, the Where's My Water? star is a crocodile, for Pete's sake. A smiling, preening crocodile, but a crocodile, nonetheless.

Swampy would possess a range of dangerous bite-based standard attacks, and maybe the odd tail whip. The true showstopper, however, would be his level-flooding special attack.

Om Nom (Cut The Rope)

This cute chappy might be small, but with that voracious appetite and expandable gob he'd be handy in a scrap. We can imagine Om Nom swallowing his enemies whole à la Kirby in Smash Bros.

As for Om Nom's special attack, watch out for those candy boulders cut loose from the sky.

Barry Steakfries (Jetpack Joyride)

Although Barry made his debut in the entertaining Monster Dash, we're thinking more of his successful turn in Jetpack Joyride.

The potential power of Mr Steakfries's machine gun / jetpack hybrid - both for zipping around levels and taking out foes below - would be obvious, though he'd be a rather sluggish character to control when on terra firma.

Infinity Blade knight (Infinity Blade)

We never actually get to learn the name of the silent knight in Infinity Blade. This is chiefly because he is, in fact, many knights, who all follow in their father's footsteps and meet a grisly end at the hands of the God King.

Still, take one of these knights - armed with the iconic Infinity Blade itself, of course - and throw him into battle with a bunch of devastating slash moves. He'd be the ideal tank character.

Rolando (Rolando)

If you arrived late to iOS gaming, you might not remember the Rolando games. They were, however, two of the finest games of the platform's early years.

What's more, the Rolandos themselves were beautifully designed characters. They're characterised by their various physics-based abilities, so here we can imagine switching between the different types at will to keep your opponent on their toes.

Grunt (Fieldrunners)

In Fieldrunners, the grunt is both your main antagonist and the game's mascot. As a single grunt, your default attacks would be pretty puny, but the ability to call in a bunch of your cloned brothers to swamp the enemy would prove useful.

Then, there's the helicopter airstrike special...

John Gore (Minigore)

Block-headed John Gore's Rambo-like arsenal of weapons would have obvious benefits in a party combat game such as this.

You'd definitely pick John at the start screen if you like to keep your opponents at arm's length and dancing to the beat of your bullets.

Regret (Zenonia)

We'd have no - ahem - Regrets about including the main figure in the smash hit iOS action-RPG series Zenonia in our all-stars brawler.

Swift short-range blade attacks interspersed with magic attacks would be the name of the game - much like Link's role in the Smash Bros games.

The star of the Zenonia franchise might have to tone down his language a little, though. This would be a family game, after all.

Doodle the Doodler (Doodle Jump)

There may be hundreds of Doodle Jump clones on iOS, but there's only one Doodle the Doodler.

We can see this hand-scrawled character being a tricky customer to contend with, what with his unorthodox bouncing movement an' all.

When it comes to attacks, those pea shooter-like nose balls would certainly do more than just sting.

Jon Mundy
Jon Mundy
Jon is a consummate expert in adventure, action, and sports games. Which is just as well, as in real life he's timid, lazy, and unfit. It's amazing how these things even themselves out.