Every Thursday, we take time out to look at the week's new and noteworthy iOS games in both words and video.
It's been a deathly slow week, but we do have the fab Impossible Road, a stark ball-rolling game in which cheaters do indeed prosper. Plus, there's Perfection and Dig!
After that, we had to start scraping the barrel just to fill up this article. We even had to play a Zynga game. I know, right?
But we did manage to find some stuff worth talking about - Chuck the Muck and Tasty Tadpoles, for example.
Anyway. Enough talk. Watch the video, then read on for prices and App Store links.
By Pixels on Toast - iPhone, iPad (£1.49 / $1.99)
In Mario Kart 64's Rainbow Road, you could easily beat the competition by leaping off into space and (hopefully) landing on a much later part of the track.
It was a cheat, of course. But Pixels on Toast takes that idea and turns it into a bona fide strategy for success. So, when you inevitably topple off this game's thin, winding, spiralling, curving road, you can try to land on lower portions of the track and keep going.
When you finally master it, rolling and dropping down the track is a sheer edge-of-your-seat thrill. And the fact that you can take another go so quickly means this might very well become your new addiction.
If you're done with Super Hexagon, make this your new sado-masochistic game of choice.
By Dumb and Fat - iPhone, iPad (69p / 99c) [Also on Android]
Next up on our list of staggeringly minimalist games: Perfection, from Sling It! maker Dumb and Fat.
In this one, you must lop off bits of a big floating polygon so that it will fit snugly in the awkward and lumpy line beneath. The idea is to do it in as few slices as possible, and attain that all-important "Perfection" award.
It's got a Zen-like ambient soundtrack, and a great utilitarian art style. The only weird thing is the structure: every level is randomised, so there's no real progression or classic sense of accomplishment.
But, still. It's an addictive little number while it lasts. Well worth a stab.
By Crescent Moon Games - iPhone, iPad (£1.99 / $2.99)
Dig! is Qix. You know, the Taito arcade game where you have to keep dividing up a big rectangle with lines. But more enjoyable than I just made it sound. Sort of.
Anyhow, this is Qix with an archaeology theme and enemy zombies to avoid. Our hero, Douglas, must chip away at some hapless fella's back garden until he's unearthed all the hidden toilet seats, plates, and spanners.
Enjoyable enough, and it looks great. But it really comes down to how much you love Qix. Do you love Qix? Does anyone love Qix? If you love Qix, please write in. You may be the last of your species.
Daddy Was A Thief
By Cezary Rajkowski - iPhone, iPad (£1.49 / $1.99) [Also on Android]
In Daddy Was A Thief, the term 'break in' is taken literally. Because when you burgle a skyscraper in this game, you actually smash your way down the building by crashing into floorboards and stomping through ceilings.
It looks like madcap, knockabout fun, but it becomes very rote and repetitive, very quickly. You just keep swiping down to go from floor to floor, hopefully causing some destruction along the way.
It's not especially clear how the combo system works, either. Top marks to the dev for trying to put a fresh spin on the ever-so-tired endless-runner genre, then, but this one just isn't much fun.
Chuck the Muck
By Kiz Studios - iPhone, iPad (Free) [Also on Android]
Chuck the Muck is the latest physics-based puzzle-platformer to grace the App Store. This time, you're a wad of... I don't actually know. I don't think I want to know.
Whatever the case, you're after some gems.
So, you move about, and forge trampolines at set points on the level. You then fling yourself - Angry Birds style - around the stage, avoiding guards and bats and volcanoes while doing so.
It's got lots of levels and gear to find and buy. It looks quite posh, too. Shame the controls are a bit naff.
By Mark White - iPhone, iPad (69p / 99c)
Tasty Tadpoles is a cute casual game. You've got these single-screen ponds, in which you - a delicate, and likely delicious, tadpole - need to avoid bigger frog toddlers on your way to the exit.
The creator of Tasty Tadpoles keeps mixing things up with new ideas. You start with green tadpoles that move about on set guard patterns, but then you'll meet yellow tadpoles who chase you when you get too close. Things like that.
It's easy and low impact, but could be good for kids, I guess.
By Ravensburger Digital - iPhone, iPad (£1.99 / $2.99)
How about a German boardgame next, eh?
Here's how it goes down. In each round, six casinos get a random amount of cash attributed to them. Then, players roll a handful of dice, and can choose to invest in a casino with the same number as one or more of their dice.
Up to three other players do the same. Finally, at the end of the round, each of the casinos' money is given to the players who have invested the most dice.
BoardGameGeek gave the physical edition 6.9/10. This digital remake is rather spiffy and has all the bells and whistles you'd expect. Online, local, single-player mode, asynchronous play, and the like. Good stuff.
Running with Friends
By Zynga - iPhone (Free) iPad (Free)
Dear video game industry,
Can we please go one week without an endless-runner? Just one measly week. Seven days without a game about running full tilt until you inevitably stumble into a crevice and die. I'm sure it's possible.
Until then, we get Running with Friends from Zynga, a bull-based runner with a social element. The idea is that you swap scores with a Facebook friend, and each player can take his turn in his own time. Like in Words With Friends.
But you can just fork out for in-app purchases to artificially inflate your score with unfair boosts and revivals, so who really cares?