Daddy Was A Thief

If there's a message behind Daddy Was A Thief, then it's something along the lines of 'crime does pay, but not for very long'. Each in-game spree ends with an inevitable painful death, and each death takes you a little closer to laying down the swag bag for good.

This is a simple, brief, arcade high score-chaser that anyone can pick up and play. But look past the initial casual fun and you'll find that it doesn't have much to offer beyond the same downward spiral of criminal activity repeated ad infinitum.

You play as an overweight man who takes to thievery when he's fired from his job.

And so it is that you find yourself escaping from a robbery, trapped in a tower block. From there the only was is down, and you have to bellyflop your way through the floors.

Swiping down makes you smash the floor and drop to the next one while swiping up makes you do a little jump. There are coins to collect on some floors, as well as objects that can be turned to your advantage.

Dive in a bath, for example, and you'll smash through a handful of floors in quick succession. Jump in a fridge and you'll be cocooned in protective ice for a brief spell. There are less helpful obstacles, too, including cops, old ladies, and lasers that shrink you if they hit.

Rockets fly in from the sides of the building, SWAT members try and pump you full of lead, and occasionally you'll drop into a pinball machine and be buffeted around while grabbing coins.

It all sounds quite exciting, and for the first few runs it is. But after a while the shine starts to wear off and you realise you've seen everything the game has to offer.

The compulsion to push deeper into the building to get a higher score never really materialises, and after an hour or so of play it's unlikely you'll ever pick the game up again.

Still, there are worse ways to have spent that hour, and while Daddy Was A Thief lacks any real depth you'll probably be smiling for the brief period of your life you're playing it.