Parachute Panic

Having worked as an office manager in a past life (Ancient Egypt), I’ve always considered Health & Safety regulations to be more for the benefit of companies that want to avoid being sued than employees who want to avoid injury.

Despite this cynical take on an esoteric regulatory framework, I can’t help but feel that someone should have explained the concept to the poor parachutists in Parachute Panic before they decided to go up in the sky for a once in a lifetime sky-jumping experience.

No doubt most would have backed down once they saw what they’d have to sign up for - especially the strong possibility of being maimed, eaten, and abducted by errant UFOs.

Your task, as benevolent overseer of parachutists, is to safely guide little stick-men gracefully down from the plane’s door to the waiting ships below.

Controls simply involve tapping on the person to open their chute, then sweeping across the screen to produce a gust of wind, keeping them on course to land safely.

Should you miss the boat (quite literally), then don’t worry too much about trying to rescue your disappointed guests from Poseidon's watery grip, as there are plenty of hungry sharks waiting to devour them instantly upon hitting the waves.

It’s not just sharks that want a piece of the parachutists. Helicopters and UFOs fly onto the screen at regular intervals to kill your followers, requiring a healthy amount of tapping to destroy.

There are also bonuses such as blowfish and Doodle Jumper (from Doodle Jump) to consider, as well as a multiplier gained by opening the parachutes milliseconds before the little men land on the boat.

Even just a few levels into Normal difficulty should ask some tough questions from the player, with countless items and obstacles on screen at once requiring furious tapping, swiping, and strong co-ordination skills to overcome.

It’s hard not to be charmed by the simple yet attractive presentation of Parachute Panic - from the notepad, doodle-style drawing to the amusing a cappella singing that accompanies the menu and Game Over screens.

It’s a good thing, too, as you’ll be seeing that final screen countless times before you stop playing, especially as the game displays the next best score from your Xbox Live friends at all times, egging you on to do better.

It’s a shame that there’s no way of viewing global scores, especially if your friends mainly play on the Xbox rather than the WP7, but as a slice of quick-hit gaming, Parachute Panic is worth filling out the forms for.