The Vampire's Assistant

I might be mistaken, but I'm sure my local community college offers a GNVQ in the art of being a vampire's assistant. It's one of those weekend courses, where you do all the work on your own and, if you're lucky, get to meet your tutor once a month for 15 minutes over a latte.

Even if I'm wrong, Universal Studio's Vampire's Assistant hardly has the most glamorous of titles. Though it fits in nicely with Hollywood's current obsession with all things Stoker, who exactly wants to be anyone's assistant?

As a profession, it sounds a little mediocre and, perhaps aptly in that respect, I-play's tie-in is much the same, offering up a fairly standard yet slightly shallow platform adventure that does its subject matter only cursory justice.

Though the plot dabbles with the idea of vampires facing off against the 'evil' Vampaneze, in truth your job as assistant is fairly plain. It all takes place in fairly short, maze like levels through which you set off to find key items for your fangy friends, each one hidden in a chest and coming with a piece of a grander map that's the key to defeating your foe.

The levels themselves consist of platforms, stalked by zombie-like adversaries and littered with orbs to up both your health and 'mana power', which, when full and activated, can get you a short burst of invincibility.

Play rarely ventures beyond platforming staples, smashing open boxes for treats and attacking enemies repeatedly with the '5' key the most common activities. The odd end of level boss harks back to scrolling beat-'em-ups of old, albeit in hackneyed fashion.

Though this might please those out for a retro fix, The Vampire's Assistant feels a little tired and a touch lazy, slowdown in some of the early levels wearing away any possible lustre the game might have had left.

The Vampire's Assistant also has the potential to leave many trapped, with set combinations of box pushing and level pressing sometimes leaving you in an inextricable pickle should you not follow the game's set path. It's often not immediately apparent, which is a little frustrating when a level reset is the only way out.

That said, for the most part The Vampire's Assistant is perfectly playable. Its no-risk structure is a little dull but equally safe as a result.

The problem is, by following such a sheltered path The Vampire's Assistant feels uninspired. Considering it's attached to one of the winter's biggest movies, toeing such a submissive line – assistant or not - just doesn't really cut it.