Destruction Derby

Seeing as Destruction Derby was a (European) PlayStation launch title, I have this strange feeling that I should be looking back on it fondly. It's true that at the time of release its production values made 16-bit classics like Micro Machines: Turbo Tournament 96 (also released in 1995) look about as exciting as a crossword about kitchen utensils.

It's a title synonymous with a very exciting time in gaming's history, then, and perhaps we're spoiled these days, but upon playing Destruction Derby again, my memory of that time now feels tainted.

Granted, the amount of cars onscreen all at one time is quite a feat considering the age of the game, as is the collision detection and vehicle deformation dynamics. But the simple sad fact of the matter is that Destruction Derby is more often than not a bore to play, riddled with niggling AI problems and missed potential.

If you're not familiar with it, it's a straight-up stock car racing effort, consisting of four categories: Wreckin' Racing, Stock Car Racing, Time Trial and, of course, Destruction Derby. The first two take place across a selection of race tracks, with the former being all about crashing for points while the latter merely a straight dash to the finish. The Destruction Derby option is all about the crashing but takes place exclusively on a series of bowl shaped arenas as opposed to on tracks, so as to allow for the most amount of carnage possible.

Then there's the obligatory Time Trial, whose place in this game seems entirely needless and perfunctory. Still, everything is divided into Practice, Championship and Multiplayer modes (which are of the pass the pad, or in this case, PSP variety) making for a reasonably comprehensive package all round.

Though the core mechanic of the game revolves around high speed crashes, this usually self evident thrill is completely undone by by the poor AI. You see, every driver clusters around one point: you. In effect, you end up with a sort of grotesque parody of a traffic jam as opposed to a gleefully chaotic pile-up.

In these situations, it often takes the AI drivers an age to get themselves out of your way so that you can take a run up at the next crash and you spend your time trying to awkwardly manoeuvre your vehicle around a gaggle of gunning morons. Which is about as much fun as trying to fill up at a UK petrol station on the day before a new budget is announced.

Then throw in the fact that the cars range from being about as manoeuvrable as a rhino in a skip to something akin to trying to reign in the twitchy erratic impulses of an oversized squirrel on roller skates. Residing at either end of this considerable spectrum, the vehicles feel like they're singularly ill-designed for the purpose of driving or crashing, under- or oversteering in ways that often seem hard to predict.

It is worth noting that the handling of the vehicles is affected dramatically by any shunts and collisions you take, which while no doubt 'realistic', seems to serve little purpose in an arcade title like Destruction Derby, other than to bedevil the player with one more frustration in a game already fraught with unfair and unrealistic punishment.

On a more positive note, visually the game holds up well and the presentation is generally pretty good. The action replays are a nice touch and the vehicle selection screens feature nice animated clips of the cars spinning around the Dust Bowl arena performing all sorts of fancy skids and turns. On the other hand, by today's standards the sound design is awful with just five commentator clips looped endlessly against a completely ill-matched fizzing techno soundtrack.

It is hard to deny the initial appeal of the Destruction Derby bowl races, and their preoccupation with mindless carnage. But they're effectively a short-lived, empty thrill in a game that has too many flaws to ignore. You embark on what you expect is going to be a trip down memory lane, then, only to crash violently at the very first bend.