Alchademy review - A game that's not really actually a game

Alchademy isn't really that much of a game. It's essentially a timer that you watch, then something happens, then you watch another timer.

Essentially you're making potions. Take one ingredient, mix it together with another ingredient, and you'll probably end up with another ingredient.

And that's about it. There's not much else going on. Or nothing that I could find anyway. Oh this is going to be a tough one to write.

Sometimes you'll mix things together and end up with a useless brown rock. So essentially you'll have wasted a minute of your time for almost literally no reason.

Other times you'll get an item that just sits in your collection. So again you've essentially wasted a minute of your time for almost literally no reason.

Even when you get another ingredient you just end up with another item that you can combine to maybe get another item or not get another item.

Getting the different ingredients isn't really that interesting. They're not cute animals, they don't add anything to the experience, it's just more stuff. Stuff, stuff, stuff.

It's really difficult to find a single thing to recommend about Alchademy. Any of the magic of the subject matter is lost in a fuzz of almost literally nothing.

Sometimes you'll get to tap a bubble. And that's pretty much the highlight of the experience. Tapping bubbles. Oh dear.

And now we've got to the end of the review. Er, this game isn't very good. Oh, the art style is pretty solid, so that's likely to get it an extra point.

I've played a lot of games in my career. Like, an awful lot. And that means I can usually find something worth commending them for.

But there's not that much going for Alchademy. It's not very interesting, it's not very engaging, and I'm glad I don't have to play it anymore.