The Escape

We wouldn't want to be lab rats.

That may seem like a pretty obvious thing to say, but man, finding your way around mazes all day only to get put straight back in them again must be pretty disheartening. If you're thinking: "What drove Pocket Gamer to this startling conclusion?", the answer is that, well, The Escape is basically a lab rat simulator. And, like the lifestyle it emulates, it's bad. Really bad.

Let's start with the graphics. Although full 3D gaming still seems impressive for mobile, on our test unit (a not-exactly-underpowered Nokia N73) the game ran so poorly that it felt like watching someone hurriedly telling a story by flicking through big bits of card, occasionally dropping them all along the way and looking sheepish.

Not only that, but each level takes a huge chunk of time to load, despite them all looking exactly the same: dark mazes and more dark mazes and, um, some more dark mazes, all identically (and suitably grimily) textured.

Then there's the character himself, or 'Ol' Jelly Shoulders' as we call him, thanks to 'his' disturbing habit of wobbling his shoulders when he moves, which is quite distracting when the viewpoint never changes from a 'chase cam' perspective. Actually, we lie: the camera does do a little swoop around when you manage to find the exit, but the uncomfortably pointy nature of our escapee's face makes him look like a half-rat, half-human hybrid (See! We told you!).

The other main reason that The Escape is rubbish is that it never really changes. It's always a case of finding the exit of the level within the maze, the discovery of which is basically just about pushing the odd crate in such a way that it doesn't block where you need to go (which, of course, you might have no idea about, in which case it's pot luck time).

If that makes this sound like a 3D version of classic block-pusher Sokoban, don't get your hopes up – it's nothing like as interesting, although your actual movement around the maze is as restricted as the aforementioned title, featuring only the ability to move to the next square and turn in 90-degree increments.

To make things worse, the game imposes one of the most universally hated constructs in gaming: a time limit. And not even a nice, friendly, nudge-in time limit, but a viciously tight one. It's so strict that you've got very little room for making mistakes and given that there's no top-down view (so you don't know where a path may lead), there has to be a fair bit of trial and error in finding the exit. Yet should you do it one too many times, bam; there's no way you'll make it to the end, leaving no choice but to restart.

All of these grumbles leave us little time to mention what we liked about the game, which is convenient because there wasn't really anything anyway. The Escape, essentially, is a PETA-produced undercover video expose, bringing the plight of science-bound rodents to the world's attention. Only without the throwing of paint on fur – and therefore all of the fun.