Darts XXX
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| Darts XXX

Ah, darts. Just the word conjures up memories of endless, hopeless nights on the town, trying to be good at 'throwing arrows' and chatting up girls… It's as though it was only last week. In fact, it was last week. Bada-boom!

Meanwhile, Darts XXX is, as you might expect, another in a (very) long line of collisions between 'erotic' content and mobile games. But hey, some of you must like this stuff, so companies will keep making it – and we'll keep reviewing it.

The game's premise is pretty simple: you play darts to beat various score targets; beating the targets unlocks pictures of semi-nude ladies.

Originally released back in 2003, Darts XXX hangs together remarkably well under today's harsh interrogation lamps. The game's visuals are pretty smart, with the menu screen imaginatively created as a bar room. Click on the jukebox to turn the sound on/off, the emergency exit sign to quit, and the darts board to, yes, play a game of darts! It's cool to see a bit of effort put into things like this – it immediately gives you a warm 'n' fuzzy feeling.

The gameplay kicks off with a selection screen that offers you the choice of girls ranging from poor old 'Natalie' (requiring a score of 300 points to unlock) up to top-of-the-line 'Jeanine' (700 points). Also offered is a Highscore Attack mode in which you play to set the highest possible score within a set number of rounds (five dart throws per round).

Throwing the dart is pretty much as you'd expect. Overlaid on the darts board is a floating hand graphic that you move around to take aim. To make proceedings a bit trickier however, the hand wobbles around all the time, and this movement is set just on the right side of frustrating.

Also, it may just be our imagination but the wobbling seems to increase on the levels with higher score targets. Or maybe it's just the added pressure of needing to hit the trebles in order to proceed that makes it seem to move around more?

Successfully completing the targets results in the revealing of the topless girls, each of which is presented with a suitably tacky tagline. A couple of Pocket Gamer favourites include, 'Well done, but will you also hit my very own Bull's Eye…?' and, 'Oh yeah, winners always make me hot!' God, whoever had to write that stuff must have been fighting back the tears – either of ironic laughter or desperation at their chosen career path. Oh no, wait, the latter was us…

In truth, we quite liked the darts part of this game. If you can ignore the 'XXX' bit then this isn't a bad piece of mobile entertainment. And if a few saucy pics is what you're particularly after with your mobile action, you'll enjoy it even more. The replay value is fairly limited, though, and that's a shame because with a League or Championship mode, Darts XXX might have made for a pretty strong game of mobile darts, boobs or no boobs.

Still, we're guessing it's probably sold at least a couple of more than it would have done minus the girls. Simple old world, innit?

Darts XXX

Who said darts can't be sexy? Well us for one, but Darts XXX could have been a lot worse
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