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What songs would Clash Royale's iconic characters sing at karaoke?

Answering the questions no one else asked
Product: Clash Royale | Publisher: Supercell | Format: Android, iPhone, iPad
Supercell has finally come out and announced Clan Wars for Clash Royale through the medium of video, and frankly, it's raised more questions than it's answered.

We still don't really know what it is, exactly when it's coming out (though we do have a theory on that one), or what other changes it may bring, but we do know this – the Clash Royale characters love a bit of karaoke.

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Which left us wondering, if those plucky units had made it into the karaoke bar before it was unceremoniously blown up, which songs would they have picked?

Looking for some more normal coverage of Clash Royale's Clan Wars? Find out everything we've dug up on the mode so far right here.

Yes, gather round folks, as we make terrible jokes about the names of Clash Royale units, and decide once and for all which bangers they'd belt out given a stage and a microphone.

Hog Rider

Song: War Pigs by Black Sabbath

He's riding on a pig, right? And he's going to war? It makes a lot of sense, when you think about it.

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True, Black Sabbath's epic track is an anti-war song, but Hog Rider is a man who thinks it's a smart move to run into battle on the back of a crazed pig, so what does he know about subtext? Or even text, for that matter?

Lava Hound

Song: Pardon Me by Incubus

This is one for the emo/nu-metal crowd, who (hopefully) immediately got this one. For everyone else, it's all in the chorus – "Pardon me while I burst into flames".

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Because the Lava Hound bursts into smaller, flaming pups when it dies, right? And this is sort of a song about being reborn, if my interpretation is anything to go by. Plus, imagine a giant flying dog trying to flip between rapping the verses and screaming out the chorus. Beautiful.

Night Witch

Song: Soul Suckin' Jerk by Beck

The Night Witch would likely love the irony of singing along to Soul Suckin' Jerk, when she is in fact the one sucking away at people's souls through her bats and magic. Because evil people love irony. Especially in karaoke.

It may not be the most obvious choice for a karaoke number, but it's a perfect song to shout out before running into battle. Especially if you hate your boss. Which I guess is you? So maybe the Night Witch hates you? You might need to take this one up with HR, I'm staying well clear.

Skeleton Army

Song: Skeleton by The Front Bottoms (WARNING: Strong language!)

They're skeletons, yeah? Look, this idea sounded really good on paper. I'm struggling now.

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There's something quite appealing about a bunch of skeletons all chanting along to a pop-punk masterpiece, either way.

Maybe they'd have to change some of the lyrics around though, I'm not sure skeletons can get stoned. At least, not in the way the song describes. Can I even say that here? MOVING ON.

Royal Ghost

Song: Royals by Lorde

Right, confession – I've only listened to this song like, three times, but it seemed kind of perfect anyway. Because he's a royal ghost. You see? My talents are wasted here, I swear.

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Better yet, there's kind of a haunting back-up vocal section that the Royal Ghost could play around with here, maybe call up some of his mates from the Other Side to help him out? That sounds quite nice, actually. It's always good to have friends.

Reviewer photo
Ric Cowley 23 April 2018
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