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10 reasons you won't buy a Nintendo 3DS

Paddling in the shallows, look twice before you leap

10 reasons you won't buy a Nintendo 3DS
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3DS

It's the hot new portable games console that will be making headlines for the rest of the year, so you might think it's a done deal everyone will be buying a Nintendo 3DS.

That's not necessarily the case however. There are plenty of things not yet known about the console as well as some things we do know that we simply aren't too impressed with.

So here are 10 good reasons why you shouldn't necessarily be clamouring to pre-order Nintendo's newest handheld.

1. Enough DS already

Everyone already owns a Nintendo DS in some form. Many of us have more than one. Presumably several million of us have all four versions to date. Frankly, Nintendo needs to think more carefully about how it rolls out its hardware, because this constant iteration is annoying and confusing consumers.

For example, why did it release the larger DS XL, only to go back to the DSi standard size for the 3DS? If the XL was the best console, then build the 3D into it. If it wasn't, why release it in the first place? In such a context, why should we trust Nintendo not to release another version of the 3DS in a year's time? Roll on the 3DS XL...

2. The slot of death

Despite rumours about improving the wi-fi features and some mumblings from EA about the DSiWare digital store, Nintendo has done precious little to prove that digital distribution is a priority. Retail remains key for the company, and until it completely shakes up its business model it's hard to see why we won't still be buying expensive cartridges to experience the majority of 3DS titles. Heck, even Sony managed to drop UMDs for PSPgo.

Of course the restrictions of cartridges aren't limited to the cost of games, physical media is also a massive obstacle for developer innovation in terms of game size, complexity and business models. Many of the current innovations occurring in the iPhone space (such as freemium games fed by micro-transactions, or even just smaller more experimental titles) would be far trickier if not entirely inconceivable on cartridge.

3. Only Nintendo wins

Linked to this retail obsession is Nintendo's failure to encourage and promote indie developers. The bitter joke is only Nintendo makes money from Nintendo platforms and despite its squeals, there aren't (m)any examples of companies that come close to rivaling the success of first party titles.

There are for instance a wide range of companies experimenting with a huge variety of games for WiiWare and DSiWare. However, as very few have been able to break into the central hub occupied by Nintendo and select partner to score a genuine commercial success there's little incentive to continue supporting the platforms. Compare this with Apple's approach on iPhone, a flourishing open platform that supports an eco-system of thousands and the difference is clear.

4. Does it work?

I'm happy to be proved an outlier but none of the demo 3DS games on show at E3 worked especially well for me, and many of them were actively bad experiences demonstrating ghosting or poorly constructed 3D images. Some non-interactive movie sequences such as How To Train A Dragon 3D or Metal Gear Solid Snake Eater did work well, but it seems game developers have a lot to learn to make the best of the technology.

5. Does it work for you?

As witnessed by the slider on the side of the 3DS’ top screen, Nintendo clearly understands that each individual player has an individual requirement in terms of how 3D works for them. Apparently a result of the lateral distance between your eyeballs, and other physical differences, the slider is there to adjust the effect so it best suits the player, potentially on a per-game basis.

For many people this will be just too complex - they will blame the game or the 3DS, not their own idiosyncrasies - while also suggesting 3D isn't the sort of technology that plays well to the mass market, which has recently been Nintendo's strongest suit.

6. Does it work for games?

Sure 3D is cool, but as yet, 3D effects aren't proven outside of the movie theatre. Film makers are experts at complex visual effects that draw the eye to certain parts of a scene, or using tricks and illusions to drive character, storyline and plot. This is not the focus of games, which provide players with the interactive freedom to create their own experiences within a defined set of limits, usually down the barrel of a gun or on the edge of a sword.

Of course, game developers will get better at using these techniques but there is a fundamental issue in terms of handing over control of the camera to the player that will be difficult to mesh with the sort of immersive 3D effects we've seen from the controlled camera medium that is movies.

7. The DS is old news

It may appear churlish to complain that the best selling games console ever is old fashioned and technically limited, but even with its redesign, the Nintendo 3DS feels like an oddity, especially as the 3D effect is only applied on the top screen, effectively relegating the bottom screen to being a control input or inventory. In addition, with high-end metal framed devices such as iPhone, iPad and touchscreen smartphones flooding onto the market, the 3DS is in danger of looking and feeling increasingly like a toy.

8. Killer apps?

The most fundamental question for 3D effects is how will they make games better? Perhaps overly philisophical, nevertheless Nintendo hasn't had a stab at explaining why it's adding 3D to the DS, other than the assumption that 3D is the hot new technology.

Even ignoring technical issues, it's not clear from the games demonstrated thus far that 3D will radically change the way games play, although it certainly should change the way they look. A better look isn't the same as a better experience though, and Nintendo will need a demonstrative first party game that's the equivalent of Mario 64 revolutionalising 2D platformers with 3D controls and graphics if it's to properly showcase what the Nintendo 3DS is all about.

9. Times are tough and competitive

When the DS launched, Nintendo owned 100 percent of the portable handheld market. Since then Sony's launched the PSP, which despite being branded a failure, has sold 50 million units. More recently Apple has sold c.50 million iPod touches, many of which are owned or used by teenageers - exactly the sort of market Nintendo used to call its own.

Of course, globally, the number of middle class families who can drop $200 or $250 on a consumer electronics device for their kids has also risen, so there's probably enough to go around, despite the dropping birthrate of Japan and Western Europe. Still, there's much more competition for what used to be Nintendo's dollar than before. And don't forget, much of the developed world is still only six months out of a recession.

10. Virtual Boy Mark 2?

Despite all their focus testing and market research, companies make mistakes, so the existence of the Nintendo 3DS isn't in itself a guarantee of success. Nintendo may have scored a palpable critical hit from the early press at E3, but it has plenty more work to do over the months ahead if it is to convince critics and consumers the 3DS won't be another Virtual Boy.

Has Jon been too tough on Nintendo's newborn? For a more optimistic view check out 10 reasons why you will want to buy a 3DS
Jon Jordan
Jon Jordan
A Pocket Gamer co-founder, Jon can turn his hand to anything except hand turning. He is editor-at-large at PG.biz which means he can arrive anywhere in the world, acting like a slightly confused uncle looking for the way out. He likes letters, cameras, imaginary numbers and legumes.